By Karl Arnold Belser
11 January 2015

I am considering New Year's resolutions, and I am wondering if I am making any progress in my personal development.

The article from Business Insider titled 10 Ways To Become Incredibly Charismatic caught my attention, and I almost did not read it because of the self-important title. However, the word effective could be substituted for the word charismatic. further I am guilty of doing some of the things that might make me ineffective. Hence, I want to discuss some of the ways here so as to help myself become conscious of my errors.

In short,  to be effective one has to give full undivided attention to the other person by listening and giving praise for what they have done. This implies that one must pay attention to what other people do that you think is important, and support their actions without robbing them of the credit.

I remember a story about the woman servant of  Napoleon's wife Josephine. The servant would discuss politics with Josephine and make suggestions which Josephine would communicate to Napoleon. Napoleon would take action, be successful and take credit for what he had done. The moral was "One can perform miracles if one does not care who gets the credit".

The more subtle of the observations is that one should avoid negative comments in order to motivate people. In other words "look for the good and praise it', and otherwise say nothing. In addition it is wise to "give the dog a good name" as Dale Carnegie says in his book How to Win Friends and Influence People. This means to describe people and things in a positive way. A corollary is "don't Gossip".

I am far from perfect in all of these attributes, and I intend to implement as many of these good practices as I am able.
Last updated January 11, 2015
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